Monday, October 15, 2007

"SIGH"

We moved to AZ two years ago. I can not shake the feelings of restlessness, and not feeling settled here. And to say the least it is very unsettling. (ha!) I am sure that I haven't hidden the fact that I have been homesick. I miss my family, more than I was expecting to. I miss my kindred spirits. I have two special friends that know me, and understand me and are so much like me.
I know that living in the same place for 14 years prior to moving here has something to do with it.

I just have to say thank goodness for phones and email!

Since moving here we have been looking for the perfect opportunity to buy a house. But for many different reasons things have not worked out that way. I think the hardest thing to deal with is all of the unknowns. Trying to guess why things have happened the way they have.
Jim looks at it as a blessing... house prices have dropped considerably in the last couple of years, and we most likely would be upside down in our mortgage right now if we would of purchased when we first moved here.

Wondering why things have not just fallen perfectly into place, has me wondering if we made the right decision in moving here. Of course we are still hanging onto a longer, and hotter than normal summer..so that might play a little bit into my why did we move here anyway feelings. I think I have complained enough about that heat, that I need not explain my feelings any further on the endless, never ending, relentless sweltering HEAT that we endure day after day after day!! Oh sorry, I got a little carried away... where was I?

Oh yes, those feelings of feeling unsettled. I wonder if I am just one of those people that thinks the grass is always greener. Maybe I am never going to feel content regardless of where we live. What if I am always looking for a better job, or a more perfect place to live?

My good friend Karin tells me that we can live in the perfect place if that is what we chose to believe. I think it goes along the lines of Blooming where you are planted.



I know I need to do that in so many areas of my life. With my calling as yw president, with my job working with the kids with autism, but most importantly, with my husband and children. As their wife and mother.

Maybe I just need to sit down and cross stitch that very saying.

"Bloom where you are planted" Even if it is the desert!

1 comment:

Alissa said...

Jane-

trust me. i feel the same way... and wonder if we'll ever be happy, content and settled. HUGS.